Comments Made During the Contest

Amanda Sidorowicz (Level 4)

Aww, this was a cute story. It made me get all teary-eyed. Super sweet. Very well done. I love the bloopers at the end. What a nice touch to a great film!

Sound - Very good. Music fits well. Audio is good.
Editing/Directing - Awesome. Lots of good shots. Good variety. Everything is edited really well. Love the lipstick transition.
Set - Perfect. The school looks very old-fashioned, and the house is good.
Acting - Very good. The older characters as well as the young ones were spot on. Sally, I knew right away this was yours when I saw Caitlin! She's a very, very good actress and has got ever greater things ahead.
Script - Beautifully written. Very simple, yet amazing.

Right now, I'm going to go with a very good, but this might be one I changed. I really enjoyed watching it. Wonderful job to everyone involved!

Andrew Zhou (Level 3)

AWWWW cuuute.
Okay, what can I say about it. Since most of your comments right now will be "oh how great this is", I'm going to try to pick out a couple of bad things, so you can improve next time (though that will be hard :D)

*20 minutes later*
Yeah...it's hard.
Aside from some acting spots where it seemed awkward, I can't really pick out anything. I guess it would've been better if after Bernie said "lookin good Agnes", there would have been a tender moment before she hugs him :D

Overall Excellent

Audrey Webb (Level 5)

Very effective as a tear-jerker!

I think the effect was harmed, however, by the abrupt intrusion of the outtakes at the end. Allow that final moment of the hug to end without having the director's voice cut in. Otherwise, all that beautiful illusion is gone too quickly.

Ayal Pinkus (Level 5)

An amazing short! Really well done!

Love how you created the atmosphere of a homely loving home, through music, the pastel-colored imagery, the camera held still most of the time. The whole thing felt like nostalgia, including the font chosen for the title.

Staging was awesome too, rectangular flat backgrounds at home indicate peacefulness, the more dramatic lines of perspective in the flashbacks to when they were younger. I liked the choice of composition. Masterful.

The story had me hooked from the beginning. It implied a dysfunctional relationship, raising the questions "why?" and "What now?"

Love how the actress played Agnes could show the sorrow in her face so well.

I thought it was slightly over-acted at times, but it seemed consistent and deliberate, so I guess it was your intention. But it made it a tad too sweet for my taste (but this is just subjective taste).

The transition in the flashback was executed well; from the older to the younger Agnes putting on lipstick. Very fluid, it kept you in the story.

You really made me care about the characters. It started with what seemed like a strong disconnect between Agnes and her husband, showed them being two nice people, and ended with them connecting. It was a very touching end.

You and your team did a fantastic job!

Bill Clar (Level 5)

Score: It's a little sappy and runs on a little longer than necessary, but it gets the point across.

Lighting: Great job. No hard shadows. Everything looks naturally lit.

I like the overexposure in the flashbacks. It makes it feel like a dream, which it could be to Agnes. Those were better days after all.

Acting: Agnes is terrific. Her eyes speak volumes.

Young Agnes does a great job. She's energetic and animated.

Wardrobe: The clothes from the flashback scene look authentic. It feels like the 50's.

Script: Our better days are behind us and we're looking for ways to recapture them.
Great job!

I definitely like the new title better than "Platinum".

Cinematography: Great use of depth of field.

One thing I really, really liked is the inclusion of outtakes in the credit. It takes many people to make a film and its nice to see people having fun on the set.

Brian Howell (Level 5)

This was shot well. The sound was good, as was the editing...until the ending. I like seeing outtakes during the credits, it's entertaining. The problem here was the movie didn't really end, it flowed seamlessly into the outtakes, and that felt weird. That would be the one area of the editing that might be rethought. There is this moment at the end that wrapped the story all up, and I get pulled out of it when I here the director cut in - now I'm reminded this was a movie.

As for the story? This was very well written. It starts out with Bernie being really cold and ungrateful, then he disappears for the majority of the film; I actually thought that he was dead and she was just imagining him being there. I had no idea what was going to happen come the end. The surprise that he really is a sweet loving man was a very good one.

Overall, this is VERY GOOD.

Brian Wind (Level 5)

Script - I gave the original script a Very Good. I didn't have anything negative to say about it so I'm guessing the only reason it missed an Excellent was that it didn't have the "wow" factor for me. 4/5

Performances - The lead actress did a very good job. As did her younger counterpart. Bernie was decent, but only had a bit role really. 4/5

Cinematography - Camera appears pretty high quality. Lighting is good. Sets look good. I'm sure it's hard to do period scenes on a budget but the flashback to high school didn't strike me as the 50s. 3.5/5

Sound - Some of the music was a bit louder than the dialogue which left me constantly fiddling with the volume. 2.5/5

Editing - The transitions between flashbacks were well done. Pacing was good and some of the comedic timing was spot on. The gagreel was great, but I wish you had let the film end before we get it. 3/5

Score - It was well done, but seemed a little dramatic for what I see as a light-hearted comedic piece. 3.5/5

Direction - There were some good shots in here. I liked the shot of her alone at the kitchen table, the first shot in flashback, the reveal of the magenta hairdo, and the look on Bernie's face when he sees her hair. Nice job. 3.5/5


Script - 4/5
Performances - 4/5
Cinematography - 3.5/5
Sound - 2.5/5
Editing - 3/5
Score - 3.5/5
Direction - 3.5/5
Overall = 24/35 = 3.43/5 = GOOD

Caroline Coxon (Mod Emeritus)

Lovely looking woman. I love it when people use older characters. It doesn't happen often enough. I love, also, that you have the courage for your characters to be silent.

The scenes outside the school seemed over-exposed - if that's the right technical term! Or was it on purpose because it was the past? Somehow it didn't quite come off.

Her new hair looks a bit like mine!

Beautiful sensitive performances from everyone and good direction, filming and editing. I found the soundtrack pleasant and unobtrusive.

I liked the out-takes. But I couldn't read the credits. Too, too tiny. Maybe the out-takes came too soon after the end of the film because they rather exploded the mood of tenderness!

I gave it a very good.

Chris Keaton (Level 5)

Notes as I saw it.
- Audio, I don't know if it's my hearing, but the dialog was hard to hear over the music.

A nice little film. Not my cup of tea, but I can see some real effort was put into it.

Chris Messineo (Founder)

SCRIPT: I love this script. I reread it and loved it just as much as I did the first time. It really does bring a tear to my eye and I am just hoping that the film can capture that same spirit.

PERFORMANCES: The actors are wonderful. Perfectly cast. I felt their fear, pain, and joy. Well done everyone.

CINEMATOGRAPHY: The cinematography was very good. The exteriors felt a bit blown out, but nothing terrible. Otherwise I thought it was quite lovely and evocative.

SOUND: The interiors were okay, but the wind on the mic outside was a bit distracting.

EDITING: The editing for the film is great. It moves at a nice pace for the story and I felt myself drawn into this world and Agnes day and memories.

However, I think the decision to bring in the out-takes less three seconds after the last line - as were stilling looking at that last amazing shot filled with emotion is DISASTROUS! I literally felt tears welling up in me and then the fourth wall is broken and the work that has gone before to create that emotion is ruined. If you want to do out-takes during the credits you can, but give the audience a chance to breathe first. I don't know if yo've sent this out to festivals yet, but if there is still time, I would strongly recommend you fix this.

SCORE: The music is very nice (a little repetitive) at times, but it still feels lovely for the film.

DIRECTION: I thought the director had a strong vision and a delicate touch with this film. It is great. That is why I am so shocked by the ending.

OVERALL: I love this film. Just fix the end credits. I don't want to beat a dead horse, but to me, this is the difference between having something truly touching and something not. Still, this is a tremendous job by everyone and you should all be very proud! Lastly, I also love the new title.

David Birch (Level 5)

a little predictable, but i suppose that's what you're going for...love the out-takes...definitely moved it up one grade for me...completets the whole production...i really thought that when she pulled off her head-scarf that her hair was going to (somehow) be the color she wanted (now who'e being predictable)...anyway, well acted and produced...i'd avoid the piano score until the end...at the beginning it seems to be a little syrupy...just silence and ambient sounds might add to the emptiness that she feels...nice job...thanks...

David Laffey (Level 3)

Wow I was really surprised, at first I was worried that it was going to be slow, but it was nice seeing the story arc develop and I credit that to great screenwriting. The story was compact and had solid set-ups and pay offs, and it was sweet - a nice story to watch unfold. It also had some pretty funny moments too where I actually laughed out loud - witty dialogue.

There's great conflict on multiple levels, like her hair, their relationship, her self doubts, and so on. It was nice to see so many elements used in the story which made it interesting. I like how simply these deep conflicts are resolved as well.

Maybe if there was a different flashback (not the one from school - which was used twice) it may be good to see the two of them in another time and place, maybe a little more grown up but still in love - and with the flowers there too of course.

Could we get a shed tear from the lady? That may have helped it feel more real or more deep - maybe help the story become more powerful...

very good

Don Hume (Level 1)

Overall I thought this was well produced. The script was solid, and the director brought a lot out of the actors. Agnes was especially well done.
I thought that the transition between how goofy Agnes thought her hair looked in the afternoon with her friend joking and all, to how scared she was when Bernie came home was a little rough. Overall, however, this was well done.

Elias Farnum (Level 5)

This has to be the most sentimental and sweet film of the crop. A romantic story involving an elderly couple, can be compelling, (it was) and you have succeeded where others have failed, and that was to entertain me.

This felt so very professional from top to bottom. The main actress was perfect. The emotion/realism into every character is not only a kudo to theses actors, but I believe the director also had a hand in this excellence. Cinematography is awesome, the shots, the lighting, the angles, all the scenes.

The sound was fine, and the score was fitting in mood for the piece. This surprises me how much I like the film, as I'm normally not entertained by sentimental tales.

Very, very good job with everything. This film will be among the top. I really liked the out takes at the end. But it seems like you went right into them after the hug, like, everyone broke the third wall.

Faith Friese Nelson (Level 5)

I LOVED this. With the out-takes at the end it felt like a "short" feature. I would not change a thing. EXCELLENT!

Fred Koszewnik (Level 5)

One of the best films so far. Beautifully filmed with a charming, engaging screenplay. I loved the expressive faces of your two older main characters - so life worn and full of personality without even opening their mouths to say anything. And all of the actors delivered and brought their characters to life in a realistic manner. The musical soundtrack matched the script well. The young boy's hair was just a bit over the top. Otherwise, I wouldn't change a thing. Congratulations.

Heather O'Connell (Level 4)

Platinum – I like the snaps the paper/snaps back to reality. Great script. I love the line “Once it’s curled…” LOL. Way to go, Bernie, at the end. The acting was excellent – especially Agnes (young and old.) The “dialing” of the cell phone didn’t seem real. I love the reaction to the purple hair. Looking good! I like the way the flashback looks like it’s colorized. Love the sizzle of the eggs. The sound was clear. Well done.
Nice opening title, effective transitions. I especially like the “flash” into the past.
Good opening music, sad feeling – I thought something bad would happen. The music was appropriate and added to the mood. The whole thing was seamless. The changes to the original script worked for the film. Really enjoyed the bloopers. Looks like it was fun to make.
:) Heather

Heidtmann Oppong (Level 4)

I loved reading it in fact I enjoyed myself. Only addition is just the dialogue Split Action -adding "CONT'D" next to characters in dialogue interrupted by an action though continues talking. Mark you good for the nice video too.

Herman Chow (Level 5)

I'm loving this, almost every parts of it.

Script: I liked the story very much. The flashback works with what's going on in the present. Our protagonist, Agnes, has a very clear goal. Her hair dying color was a surprise to me and it added a little comedy to the story. Very touching ending.

Performances: All of the actors are pretty good. The woman playing Agnes, especially. Her portrayal of worrisomeness looks very real.

Cinematography: It's not the strongest suit in this type of film, but some of the close up shots were used smartly.

Sound: A little nitpicking here, but the sound mixing part in the beginning and during the outdoor scenes can be a little better. I can hear echo and wind sound.

Editing: The cut between present and the flashbacks occur at the right time.

Score: Although it's not those in-your-face sort of music, it fits the story.

Direction: The overall film looks amazing to me. I guess the uncurling the hair scene can be shortened a little bit. But the bloopers at the end just made my day.

EXCELLENT!

James Hughes (Level 5)

The ending was cut off and moved into blooper reels, I didn't get enough time with the ending, enjoying where it was and letting that emotion hit me. I suggest letting that play out a little longer and then move to credits and then show bloopers after that. Otherwise, it feels like the emotion is taken away. I liked the story, it was sweet and funny, and then I feel robbed a bit at the end.

The sound was good throughout most of it. For example when she is cooking breakfast for him in the beginning. During the last scene at dinner, I heard different tones going back and forth as the film cut between shots.

The acting was good. The wife had a good mix of being sentimental and sweet but also funny.

The shot selections and editing was well done. I felt like you had the right shots and the right cuts. It took its time (except for the last shot).

Jamie Collins (Level 3)

A very touching story. I loved this film. great performances.

Jeannie Sconzo (Level 5)

Excellent!
I absolutely love the actors in this, both the older ones and the younger ones!
They were very genuine.
I'm not completely sold on the title, although I do think the newer one is better than the original one.

JeanPierre Chapoteau (Moderator)

First impression: Wow! Winner!!! This was so sweet! Awe... It made me tear up. This was one of the greatest short films I've seen in a while! I'm talking period, not on moviepoet. Perfect perfect, prefect!

Directing: Simple. The way it should be in a drama.

Sound: In the beginning, there was a bit of an echo when Agnes spoke. But that was it. Everything else was perfect.

Music: It makes me tear up when I hear it now. Perfection. Fit the film perfectly. Is it original?

Acting: Come on now, this was professional. Top notch. Nothing amateur about it. Everyone was so on point. I didn't even notice they were acting. I was just too involved in the story. I LOVED the scene between Agnes and her friend in the bathroom. That was great. And when Agnes took off her scarf... my heart melted. I love the fact that she DID curl it, and then when she tugged at her curls... it was the cutest moment ever. She was so embarrassed. I just wanted to give her a hug and say "It's okay..."

Story: Very simple, but powerful. I saw the ending coming, but when I actually heard him speaks the words, that's when I teared up. They were perfect.

My only small, small suggestion. When the husband finally said "lookin' good Agnes" at the end, I thought there should have been a longer pause after he touched her face. I think it came too soon, so it took the moment away, just a bit. Just a TINY bit. A half more of a second pause before he said it would have have been phenomenal.

Hehe, I said it was small.

Excellent film! I'm going to show my wife when she gets home.

Jeff Ferry (Level 4)

A great story and wonderful acting by all in particular the older couple. The only parts of the video that weren't great were the flashbacks, and they were okay, but they lacked a little bit of punch next to the main characters. It started a little slow, but quickly found its legs and became very enjoyable. Great job by cast and crew.

Kenneth Hurd (Level 4)

I really liked this! Your story is excellent and your actors do an amazing job. You made excellent casting decisions for the roles of younger and older Agnes. The two actresses looked a lot alike. I also really liked that you included the blooper reel at the end, though I was a little confused at first when it started. I thought someone else was going to be in the scene at first. It might help to let the film fade out before starting the blooper reel.

Your cinematography was really good. You got a nice variety of shots and nothing became predictable. Your lighting was natural and it really fit with the story that you were telling.

You did a really nice job in editing this too. I didn't feel that it was too long or too short. My only recommendation on this would be to use less of the music during the opening. I felt it was a bit overused throughout the film. You had excellent actors, and I think you could have let them carry the scenes more than the music, and it would make the film stronger. You do have a few audio problems, but its things that I think you can fix. Some of your background noise doesn't match up well, so you may want to go in and add more room ambience under the film and use more audio dissolves between your audio cuts. It'll make it smoother. Also, during the scene where Agnes is on the phone, her dialogue shifts to the right speaker only. You may want to go back and look at that to balance it in the center. This also happens when young Bernie pulls up on his motorcycle.

That said, I really like this short. I think you did a great job pulling it off and the actress playing Agnes is one of the best I've seen while watching these shorts. If you can do a little more work on the audio, it'll be a flawless short film.

Khamanna Iskandarova (Level 5)

It's a good movie I think. The best part is the original work, the script. And that's why probably I did not appreciate the movie as much (I did appreciate it but not to the desired extent) - the script is too good and my expectations were too high.

The film lost the essence of the script, I think. I try to think why and came up with this:
The script is good for the story and for it's punchlines, for the flow in a way. It's stressed in all the important places. And it's punchy - I love you Bernie Summersby" - nothing interrupts this line in my vision when I read the script.
The movie however is a bit long for me. The friend seems too important compared to what she is in a script, and I think in a script the friend is a tool but in a movie he gives too many glances. When Agnes says "It grows on me" the camera focuses on the friend's face for too long. And that's not the only instance. I started wondering if these glances mean something, almost like the friend was in love with Bernie Summersby too.

I also think that the movie is a bit too dramatic compared to a script. The first scene in the movie doesn't have the same impact on me as in the script - the scene is to show who Agnes and Bernie really are. Bernie is so routine, that he doesn't pay attention to Agnes. In a movie it's probably overemphasized, and I get all kinds of thoughts but not the right one.

The cinematography is very nice and actors did a pro job I think. The only thing I noticed is the sound, I can hear some kind of background noise but I have to be the last one to complain:)

Overall, Good work really. I'm just a fan of the script, I guess that might be the reason why I didn't love the movie as much - expected too much of it.

Kirk White (Level 5)

beautifully shot and brilliantly cast! and I am a SUCKER for bloopers at the end of a movie so you get mad props there. The only real suggestion I would have is that I think right now as is, it runs a bit long. I think the edit could tighten up a bit to build the pacing...right now each scene runs at the same pace which makes it feel longer...however, the performances are great and it's not a deal breaker. This is a great production...be proud!

KP Mackie (Level 5)

So much heart in this emotional film and script. Thought for sure that Bernie is going to be a neglectful husband and forget their anniversary. Terrific surprise when Agnes's hair turns purple. The flashbacks are well done, short and to the point, and fit perfectly.
Acting is superb. Terrific cast. (Wonder if anyone has ever told Lynne she looks like Jill Clayburgh?)
Photography is beautiful. Top notch. Music adds atmosphere and a lovely background.
The handful of locations have detail and color. Transitions from present day to the flashbacks are smooth. The variety of shots keep the story interesting. A couple favorite scenes, but particularly like young Agnes in front of the the bathroom mirror. The close-up of Agnes unwinding her hair from the pink rollers is great; it's touching and so much more interesting than simply watching her do so from a distance.
Love the outtakes at the end.
This film is a professional endeavor from beginning to end. Excellent.

Margaret Avnet (Level 4)

An excellent use of the flashback. You feel sorry for Agnes when Bernie leaves in the morning not showing the same love that she obviously has for him.

I thought the acting was superb as well as the direction. And considering how Bernie left in the morning I didn't expect that he would remember their anniversary. It was a really beautiful touch that he said,"Looking good,Agnes," after she reveled the botched up dye job. That only showed that he still loved her now as much as he did when she was younger with the auburn hair.

Overall an excellent job.

Margaret Ricke (Level 5)

Where do you find these filmmakers? And actors? And locations?

This is wonderful, Sally. You are absolutely one of the best!

Excellent work!

Marko Trcic (Level 2)

wonderful film, so beautifully filled atmosphere, everything is perfect, I enjoyed every moment of this film, wonderful, excellent transition from the present into the past, parallel editing is excellent, except maybe a little too loud music and memories may be a bit overexposed images, but insignificant.

Marnie Mitchell Lister (Level 5)

Loved it. Adored the flashbacks. And I cried at the end.

The actors were great....I don't have anything negative to say. This was Excellent.

Martin Jensen (Level 5)

At the beginning the dialogue seemed a bit out of sync with the picture, or maybe it was dubbed in, but the sound was fine for the rest.

The flashback scenes worked really well along with the modern-day scenes to build up empathy for these characters. Although there aren't great stakes involved, I still cared greatly about these characters.

I would change the editing of the ending so it doesn't transition to the outtakes straight away. In fact, I would recommend not having outtakes at all - they take away from the emotional reality of the film and I like reading the credits.

Excellent.

Martin Lancaster (Level 4)

Excellent!

I remembr this script and the film captures every inch of the emotion from the page. Your actors are phenomenal. All of them.

I only have one small criticism:

You broke the fourth wall at the end and it pulled me out of the story right at the crucial point. All it needed was a fade out/fade in before the outtakes started.

Other than that I thought this was brilliant in every way.

Matias Caruso (Level 5)

Very nice! Pro work! The acting and the score were pretty good.

Just one thing: The husband has a quite drastic change of attitude that seems to happen out of the blue. I wish this change (which solves the main conflict) was the result of the protagonist's actions. Seems like her problems solve on their own.

Still, this was touching and fun to watch. High marks, Sally!

MJ Hermanny (Level 5)

I'm so glad this got made Sally - it's one of my favourites from you and it works just as well on screen as it does on the page.

The actors are great (especially young Agnes!) Older Agnes is beautiful and really fits the part well.

The suggestion of the fifties with the full skirts and leather jackets and softer focus work really well to give it a good period feel.

The lighting overall is good a lthough rather dark in the final scene before Agnes puts the light on and the sound seems to be a little quieter in this scene too.

The music works well with it, nice and gentle, complimenting the sweet story.

I just wish you'd held off a little longer at the end before moving in to the out takes, it was too abrupt, I was enjoying wallowing in the emotions the story stir in me and then was pulled out too sharply.

Having siad that, I did enjoy the outtakes, a nice touch.

Very well done.

Paul De Vrijer (Level 5)

WOW. I feel nothing for this genre, but this was really amazing. So fragile and touching. I mean, even the corny lines at the end, goosebumps. Amazing.

Production, direction, camera, sound, all excellent. I think it's the script thats actually keeping this back. The hair changing purple makes no sense and the dialog is a bit too simple at times.

Wife's thoughts: The flashbacks with the glow, really well done. The old actors do a great job. It's all really cute and sweet. The acting in the flashbacks is cool too, feels truly like the 50's. Even the backgrounds match. I think the 'director's break' at the end, was a bit too fast. Should have let that moment linger for just a bit longer.

Overall, beautiful, probably going to win this contest. These fragile shorts don't come along too often, great when they do.

Paul Williams (Level 5)

Awww, Sally, this lives up to the sweetness of the script.

I still like the happy ending. I do think there's a small component missing, though, perhaps one more beat or how the conflict is resolved. Nothing major though.

I was slightly worried at first about the flashbacks to the 1950's, but they came out great. The actress playing 16 year-old Agnes looks like Maggie Gyllenhal (spelled right?).

I love the out-takes at the end. Nice touch.

Very Good!

Philip Whitcroft (Level 5)

It's a great, moving story. The actors do really well with it. The lighting has a strong crisp quality and the sound was fine.

The opening in particular stood out for me, because it launches the story really well and gets the issues across without any dialogue explaining everything.

Rich Keel (Level 4)

I think story wise this is the one I have enjoyed the most thus far. Most just so a slight glimpse of a story...this showed the whole thing completely and it was a nice little story. Loved the outtakes in the credits...I thought they could've waited until after a fade or something...but nothing that hurts this by any means. So refreshing to watch. Even with the film I did everyone tries to shock, through a twist or go out there with an idea...and this is just so simple and to the point it was actually quite refreshing and entertaining.

Music - Awesome! Fits the film perfectly.

Acting - On spot. I thought the kid version of the husband could've done a little better better that is minor.

Shots - all looked great with the exception of the one shot just after bearnie leaves. She goes and stands in the hallway and in front of the window...it's a neat idea for a shot but then it seemed like the foreground was grainy and dim and the light around her made it look off...to me. Loved the look of the flash backs. Some seemed a bit a bit over "white" - if that makes sense - which I was worried about but that only seemed to happened in a couple of shots.

Audio - for the most part great...but near the end you could hear a refrigerator or something humming in some shots and not others. Not a big deal but I had headphones on so I could tell plain as day. Nothing that is going to kill he film.

Nicely done from beginning to end...
Good luck to you this month.

Edit: I cam back after I have watched them all and I feel this is the most complete film that is out there. It is entertaining all the way through and looks great! You are the only Excellent rating I gave out this month.

Rob Gross (Level 4)

Really liked the music track. Love the flashbacks and transitions from "old Agnes" to "Young Agnes". I liked the feel of the flashback. The clothing, hairstyles, sneakers made you feel like you were back in time. The story was very touching. I loved how Bernie didn't forget the anniversary.

The end was awesome. Loved the bloopers too. It was easy to like the Agnes character. You knew that line was coming as soon as she showed the pink hair. Nice to see a feel good story.

Excellent.

Robert Newcomer (Level 4)

What charming actresses, both the old and young versions of Agnes, and beautifully filmed.

In fact, all the acting was top-drawer -- even motorcycle kid, though he took more than one scene to grow on me.

Nothing negative to report here. A pleasure to watch.

Excellent

Shaheryar Ahmed (Level 3)

Cinematography: This DSLR revolution has totally changed filmmaking. I really like some of the shots. The lighting is absoloutely beautiful. I like how you simply shot it. Though it may not be simple.

Screenplay: A lovely short story. Full of emotions that got me in. I was sold from the beginning! Beautiful!

Performance: Beautiful. Excellent performances. From both, older and younger actors.

Direction: I liked how you flashbacked back to their younger days and that was just beautiful! I like the chemsitry you have formed with the characters.

Editing: Simple yet beautiful!

Tim Westland (Moderator)

My. My. My. I. Am. Impressed.

This is only the 2nd film in my voting cycle, but I would bet dollars to donuts that I will not view a better one.

So let me just get the EXCELLENT out of the way so you're not on pins and needles.

EXCELLENT !!!

Where to begin?

Casting - Wow!
Agnes (Lynne Car) Just spectacular. There's a subtley, dignity, and a little bit of world weary sadness to her performance. I so enjoyed watching her. She seemed a combination of Catherine O'Hara and Diane Keaton. Her performance was just so wonderful.

Young Agnes (Your daughter, Caitlin!!!) - There is something about her - visually - that made me believe she must be the actual granddaughter of Lynne Car. I think it was her smile. Regardless, Caitlin gave a fine performance. She was completely believable. You should be proud (I already know you are!!)

Madge (Marjorie Wilson) was just spot on perfect. I could see and feel their lifelong friendship in no small part because of this performance.

Young Madge (Kylee Thurman) - not a big part for her, but she carried herself with the sort of innocent elegance actresses from the 30s and 40s had.

Bernie (Bob Walkingshaw) - The disregard he shows in his initial introduction was perhaps a bit overplayed. This is the only "not 100% perfect" part of the film. However, his performance later in the film more than made up for it. After seeing the outtakes (which was a genius addition), I can tell he's probably a fine comedy actor.

Young Bernie (Luke Porter) - he made me laugh (in a good way). I think it's probably hard for kids his age to 'get' that sort of role. I think he did. Very fun performance.

Emotional Impact -
I'm a big softy at heart, so your wonderful film was pulling all of my strings. I found myself choking up. I loved this.

Writing -
Loved loved loved it. The rugpull with the hair color just had me rolling. The performances by those two women were priceless. They couldn't have done that without a great script to guide them!!! Well done, Sally!

Editing -
Perfect. If anyone ever wants to make one of my scripts, I want your editor.

Cinematography -
CRIMINY - SPIELBERG level. No kidding. No Hyperbole. This was big budget level stuff.
If anyone ever wants to make one of my scripts, I want your DP !!!

Sound, lighting, etc.
Excellent. I cannot say enough good things.

Direction -
If anyone ever wants to make one of my scripts, I want your Director. Period. He brought it all together.

This film hits 11 on every single point. It's incredible.

I NEED MORE ADJECTIVES !!!

I am amazed. Well done.

Travis DeStein (Level 5)

The audio seemed a little off. Everyone's voices in the beginning especially sounded drowned out in reverb or something. My biggest complaint here is the music. It's is an absolute no-go for this movie. The constant drone of those piano arpeggios is so boring and drab that it drags everything else down like a weight. I thought Bernie as a youngster was a bit too silly. He doesn't need to be such a Grease wannabe. I'm not an expert on women's hair dyes, but how exactly do you mix up purple? Someone must've noticed something so obvious on the box when they bought it. Requiem for a Dream did this so much better, the woman thought it was going to be red and it turned out a lot more orange than intended. The ending didn't seem to have much of an impact. We never seem to have much of a feeling for why she should be so desperate for a happy anniversary. Everything felt fake/melodramatic.

Valentina Reiken (Level 2)

I just loved this.
The acting was great. The story great.
The twist was good.
The characters were warmly and sympathetically presented
A sensitive and touching story with a twist of humour.
Well done!!!
V Reiken

Wayne Morrical (Level 4)

Excellent Work. Great transition to retro scenes. I like the color treatment on the retro scenes to separate from current time: although some shots were too blown-out (bright). Acting was really good especially young girls. Music was outstanding; really set mood and fit with film. Could use a small bit of tightening on the edits, in particular the hair color scenes. Outtakes at end a nice touch: Kudos!

Wes Worthing (Level 5)

I'm not afraid to say that this one teary-eyed me. The music complimented the tone. Great period piece flashbacks. Fun to include the blooper reel. The acting was believable. I like the moving shots and most of the shot decisions. I hope this makes top 3.

William Bienes (Mod Emeritus)

Lovely and professional -- very natural, excellent production value and wonderful cast.

My only bit of criticism has to do with young Bernie's mode of transportation :)

Excellent.

Comments Made After the Contest

Chris Messineo (Founder) ~ 1/1/2011 12:14 AM

Congratulations! I loved this so much. Now, I'm begging you (on bended knee), please fix the end credits and it will be perfect!

Marnie Mitchell Lister (Level 5) ~ 1/1/2011 12:16 AM

LOVED THIS!!!! Congrats!!

Margaret Ricke (Level 5) ~ 1/1/2011 12:20 AM

Knew this would place! Absolutely LOVED it! Congratulations again!

Heather O'Connell (Level 4) ~ 1/1/2011 12:26 AM

Congrats, that was my fave - excellent film.
:) Heather

Brian Wind (Level 5) ~ 1/1/2011 12:32 AM

Congratulations Sally and everyone involved! Well done!

JeanPierre Chapoteau (Moderator) ~ 1/1/2011 12:35 AM

I LOVED this one, but I have to agree with Chris M's suggestion. But wonderful film. Purely amazing.

KP Mackie (Level 5) ~ 1/1/2011 12:39 AM

A terrific movie. Congratulations!

William Bienes (Mod Emeritus) ~ 1/1/2011 1:05 AM

Congratulations -- loved it.

Amanda Sidorowicz (Level 4) ~ 1/1/2011 2:31 AM

Loved this! Very, very, very well done. Congrats on first place!

MJ Hermanny (Level 5) ~ 1/1/2011 4:56 AM

Yay! Way to go Sally!! Congratulations, loved this.

Please, please do as Chris and many others suggest with the credits though!

Caroline Coxon (Mod Emeritus) ~ 1/1/2011 6:11 AM

Many congrats, Sally! Happy New Year :)

Wes Worthing (Level 5) ~ 1/1/2011 9:15 AM

Well deserved! It was fun to watch your daughter act again.

Heather O'Connell (Level 4) ~ 1/1/2011 9:32 AM

That was your daughter? She was amazing!
:)

Andrew Allen (Level 3) ~ 1/1/2011 10:35 AM

A worthy winner. Lovely cinematography as noted, good, solid direction and some lovely performances. I disagree that the cut-in from the director detracted from the sweetness - in fact, I feel as though it stopped the end falling into the trap of melodrama. The whole production seems to have gone very smoothly.

Out of interest, what was the budget for this?

Matias Caruso (Level 5) ~ 1/1/2011 11:01 AM

Very touching. Congrats Sally!

James Resendes (Level 2) ~ 1/1/2011 11:33 AM

WOOW.
That was absolutely amazing. You did a phenomenal job with that, even bridging the past and present. It was such a touching, but fun story. Just so I don't gush for too long, these are the only two things I thought could have been better:
ONE. When Agnes is calling Madge, it just doesn't look like she's really dialing. That bugged me for some reason...
TWO. This one's more of a suggestion than anything. Just at the end, where he says "Lookin' Good", I think there should have been a little bit of a pause there before she hugged him.
But THAT'S IT! Amazing job, once again. Keep it up. =)

Sally Meyer (Moderator) ~ 1/1/2011 12:25 PM

This is a bittersweet day. I found out that I had placed first last night, and I was overwhelmed. I was touched that my good friends here on Moviepoet left me such a wonderful new years gift.

To have you enjoy the story and the actors as much as you all did, was so amazing. I will write more soon, and answer you questions and comments but wanted to thank you now for your kind comments and to let you know that
the reason this is bittersweet is that the beautiful, talented and gracious Lynne Carr who Caitlin and I have known for many years, as they have worked together on three different projects, passed away in November of this year from Pancreatic Cancer.

I actually found out right after the competition started and it has been a difficult month for me, I am glad that Bernie Summersby did so well, it is a sort of tribute now, to Lynne and her talents.

If you will indulge me, below is a brief blurb about her. She was so wonderful, she had a rare talent, and we will miss her dearly.

The beautiful Lynne Harrison Carr passed away Sunday afternoon November 7, 2010 surrounded by her children and grandchildren.

If you were ever blessed to meet Lynne even once, then you know what it felt like to share in her spirit. She was one of the most giving and loving and Christ-like women to walk this earth and if you’re like the rest of us, you know you’re a better person because she was in your life, even briefly.

She finally succumbed to the Pancreatic Cancer she had been fighting so valiantly for 10 months, of course doubling the expectations of her medical advisers – It just wouldn’t have been Lynne if she didn’t continue to exceed expectations!

Chris Messineo (Founder) ~ 1/1/2011 12:51 PM

I'm so sorry to hear about her loss. I'm touched that we were able to see her so vibrant and talented in this beautiful film.

Heather O'Connell (Level 4) ~ 1/1/2011 1:21 PM

Sally, I am very sad to hear that. I am lucky to have seen her in this film, and it is indeed a wonderful tribute to her.
My condolences.
Heather

Rich Keel (Level 4) ~ 1/1/2011 1:59 PM

This was my pick...well deserved 1st place!!!

Khamanna Iskandarova (Level 5) ~ 1/1/2011 2:43 PM

Sally, this is really sad news - she was indeed very talented.

Paul Williams (Level 5) ~ 1/1/2011 6:02 PM

My condolences to the family, friends, and loved ones of Lynne Carr. I agree, what a lovely, yet bittersweet tribute to this woman in having her memorialized in an incredible movie.

Congratulations to you, Sally, and to everyone invloved with this. You should be so proud.

Michael Cornetto (Level 5) ~ 1/1/2011 8:13 PM

Just watched this beautifully done film. Well done.

Sally Meyer (Moderator) ~ 1/2/2011 1:00 AM

Thank you all so much for the comments. I appreciate them. I am totally thrilled. I've never won a first place honor on MP and it truly is an honor, especially because of the calibre of films that were submitted. All of them were very well done, and some were just amazing.

@chrismessineo I didn't have any influence over the final edit, also. While I enjoyed the closing credits/bloopers alot. I agree that just a little bit more of the moment between Agnes and Bernie, maybe a fade out, before the credits rolled, would have made the film stronger.

The budget was 500 dollars. I am not sure how much was spent. This was part of another competition for a festival, where three up and coming directors were given a slew of scripts that had been entered in the festival, they then chose the one they wanted to make, and were given a budget of 500 dollars. I won a prize money amount of $200 but I asked to be allowed to add that money to the pot, in exchange for being a producer on the movie. This proved to be a good thing, because I was then free to enter it into festivals that I wanted to enter. I am sending this to Brussels this month, to be in a small festival there.

The director was amazing, she had a really great eye, and her vision and mine were very close. She knew what she wanted to do with this story, but she was really great in collaborating with me, through casting and the filming of the story. It was a good experience.

The actors were really awesome. Lynne brought Agnes to life, Bob was so sweet at the end with his portrayal of Bernie. I was proud of Caitlin, I liked how she made young Agnes seem so sweet and innocent. Marjorie did a really great job of being the best friend, and Kylee was so good as young Madge. She really did bring an elegance to the movie, that is rare for an actress so young. Luke was awesome as young Bernie.

A couple of people commented on Agnes when she dialed the phone, that was the one thing that bothered me too, I wish that we had used a land line for that scene.

I am not sure if we can tweak the credits at this point in time. I don't have any of the files to allow me to do so (that is if I even knew how) and the director has moved on, as have most of the people involved, so I guess it will have to remain as it is.

It is a fitting tribute to Lynne's talent, she was a remarkable woman, and I miss her.

Thank you all again, you made my whole year!!!

Rob Gross (Level 4) ~ 1/3/2011 8:04 PM

Sally-
Awesome. Congratulations. This one brought the lump in the throat and tears in the eyes.

Sally Meyer (Moderator) ~ 1/4/2011 2:03 PM

Thank you Rob!

Ali Barr (Level 4) ~ 1/4/2011 7:06 PM

Way to go Sally! This shows that story rules over budget and you all did a wonderful job on this one. I'm glad that you got this project done for Lynne. What a wonderful tribute for her family to have.

I hope to improve my skills as you have on this great site.

Sally Meyer (Moderator) ~ 1/4/2011 7:07 PM

Thanks, Ali

You have amazing skills!!!

I wish we could enter our FC movie here, but it's just too long. I wish we could edit it down. But maybe our other 'venture' we will have ready for this competition next year?

Abel Zerai (Level 2) ~ 1/24/2011 7:22 PM

From the very beginning I was hooked with the tension created. I loved it.

The story is solid leaving a wonderful impression on the viewer.
The actors did very well for the most part especially the two older actors and the young Agnes.
The music is appropriate not overshadowing the story and creating the right feel the story I believe intends.
From the audio I could hear some reverb and background noise but that's just being picky.

My favorite shot in the whole story was when Bernie first left the house and Agnes was all alone. I loved how you included the wall and the fridge to frame the shot and leaving Agnes feeling more isolated than she actually is. I could sense it was specific choice if not then it was a lucky accident.

If I could still vote I'd give this a VERY GOOD near EXCELLENT short. I look forward to watching more from you Sally and this gives me many ideas on how to set up my own short stories.

Thank you

Sally Meyer (Moderator) ~ 1/26/2011 11:33 PM

Thank you Abel for watching the movie and giving your review. I appreciate it. I loved what the director Alla did with the movie, she is very talented. It was awesome to work with her, because she caught the vision that I had when I wrote it.

thank you again!

Sally

Tim Westland (Moderator) ~ 3/1/2011 11:26 PM

I'm back watching this again. Just aces, Sally.

Sally Meyer (Moderator) ~ 3/1/2011 11:32 PM

Aww thanks Tim, that's really nice of you.

Zach Jansen (Level 4) ~ 3/2/2011 12:37 AM

There's nothing I could add to the above comments that would sound like anything but an echo, but this was a very well-done film -- sans those credits... Up until that point I was in love with the movie.

But, really, that's neither here nor there -- although, it's the gag reel that's been in my head and not the wonderful story -- so job well done. Now the rest of us know how high to aim for this year's contest.

Sally Meyer (Moderator) ~ 3/3/2011 9:41 AM

Thank you Zach. I really wish there were something I could do about the quick jump into the credits. The director has since moved on to other projects, so it is what it is.

But I do appreciate the kind words.

Basil Sunshine (Level 4) ~ 5/24/2011 2:35 AM

Oh man, that was amazing. I love this story. The beginning was so sad, by the time she was writing the card to Bernie I was already tearing up. The actors were just incredible. I agree with some of the others that the transition to the bloopers was too quick, but that is forgivable because it is quirky. Just about everything else is spot on perfect. Really amazing. Congrats!

JeanPierre Chapoteau (Moderator) ~ 4/12/2012 10:00 PM

Sally, anything come from this? It was so wonderful. I'm sure it must have at least placed in a couple of festivals by now.

Sally Meyer (Moderator) ~ 4/12/2012 10:55 PM

Hi JeanPierre. Sadly I didn't have the money to enter it into any more festivals. It did well in the one that I did enter it into. I think it's too late now to enter it anywhere. Don't festivals have a time limit on entries?

Thanks for the kind words, this one is dear to my heart, as the lead actress passed away last year.

Sally

Rick Hansberry (Moderator) ~ 4/13/2012 8:26 AM

Sally, Not all festivals require the film to be shot or made within the past year. Try an advanced search with Withoutabox.com and see if there are some that fit your criteria. Wishing you all the best. I know how closely we bond with some stories.