Comments Made During the Contest

Bill Delehanty (Level 4)

It might just be me, but your logline is missing a word or two. Warmer climes? Never heard of that unless its a spelling error.
This was all over the place for me. I thought the transition from the theater/desert to Antarctica was well done. There was also some format errors, which really shouldn't be in there. Is there any connection between the first scene and the second? Does the logline hint at it? The intro to Penguin Pete was great though.
This might a be a time where what you had in your head didn't translate to the page as smoothly as it should have.

Brendan Olenick (Level 1)

Well written, though it does look like it is and will become rather complicated. Maybe it just seems like it at the start, you seem to know where it will go.
There is a part, though, where the Captain gets shot, at first reading I thought that the Captain had shot penguin pete - could've been made more clear in the writing.

Brian Howell (Level 5)

This is GOOD, but I'll be honest, I got a little confused at times and a wee bit bored. Your characters are very unique, and there's a lot going on, I think, and it's probably a little too early to tell. I get the feeling this is going to be like this all the way - a little wacky and confusing probably until the end - maybe even then it won't be crystal clear.

I was VERY intrigued by your logline, but at this point I'm a little confused, that's all. You talk about Antarctica like it's a normal destination for people; extreme conditions but normal (like Alaska or something), but you haven't given any impression that this is in the future or that anything has changed. As of right now, Antarctica is a frozen waste land that houses a few scientists and penguins - that's it. Maybe this added to my confusion, but also you have some fairly cryptic dialogue - which is good, I just haven't acclimated to it yet because I'm only ten pages in.

So yes I'm interested in going forward, but more from your logline still and less from your ten pages. Good luck!

Brian Wind (Level 5)

I've been looking forward to this one since Round 1. Great title and an insanely creative premise.

The only formatting error I noticed was some extra spacing between dialogue at the bottom of page 7.

I found the bald French theatre troupe to be quite hilarious, but I'm still wondering what their place is in the script. And Brunt with a coat full of milk... haha. This might be the most bizarre script I've ever read.

The characters are pretty well defined, but there's almost too much going on here for 10 pages. It's a little hard to follow because we are jumping from one Arctic location to the next Arctic location and tons of characters have already been introduced.

It's hard to estimate how well this will deliver on the promise of the logline because we haven't really gotten in to the meat of the story yet. I'm guessing Souise is the crippled gunfighter but we've yet to meet his ex-wife or son. I think you're off to a pretty good start and look forward to reading the rest of this. Nice work.

Caroline Coxon (Mod Emeritus)

LOVE the opening scene with the milk - and throughout, your names and characters are mega.

Sometimes you repeat words too soon which jump out at me a bit...e.g.

You might want to leave.
Brunt takes a step. Haki looks at the man behind him.
Nods.
HAKI
Leave a bottle...the use of 'leave' twice.

french - French I think.

LOVE the introduction to Penguin Pete!

CAPTAIN
You are crazy! - think he'd say You're crazy.

I’m not crazy to travel all by
myself. - think this should be 'I'm not so crazy that I travel all by myself'

man pops up from the prone position he was lying in. - clumsy phrasing

fuming - means being very angry!

shakes his head, no. - WHO SHAKES THEIR HEAD YES???!!

I love this, really love this - the style is brilliant. My comment would be that it's the STYLE and the HUMOUR that has drawn me in - not yet the plot. I don't know who the protagonist is (except for the fact that P Pete is in the title) I imagined it to be the crippled gunfighter. Is that Souise? If it is, I think he needs more bringing out.

I KNOW it's all phooey about turning points and so on but perhaps something WAS needed at the end of p 10 by way of a cliffhanger?

But I DO SO MUCH want to see what happens.

Chris Keaton (Level 5)

Somehow when I saw this title I totally saw a animated feature. This is no animated feature. I'm not sure why Pete sunk the Icebreaker, but I'm sure we'll find out later. Hell I'm not sure what any of this is about. It was a fast flawless read and that's a damn good thing. I can't say it warms my cockles, but I'll take nicely written over poorly written any day. Good Job.

Chris Messineo (Founder)

Awesome title.

I love your characters. They are quirky and fun. The dialogue is phenomenal and each character has a unique voice.

The locations are fantastic. These settings feels so original. I can't think of another movie like this (although in a weird/cool way it does remind me of the work of Wes Anderson).

The tricky part here is the story, it is so odd, that I'm not really sure what is happening yet or who I am rooting for. In fact, I have no idea who the good guy or bad guy is. Maybe you want it that way, but I think it might be a bit too mysterious for it's own good.

Still, I really thought this was very clever with a great sense of style and I hope I get to read more.

Dan Delgado (Level 5)

It's certainly strange, I'll give it that much. Strange and confusing. The settings, the people and the dialogue were all confusing. I read it through once -- couldn't keep track of what was going on and to be honest, since I didn't see a character I cared about, I didn't really want to bother to read it again and try to sort it out. Maybe it's just a matter of taste but this one irritated me more than any of the other entries I've read so far this month. Maybe others will love it -- I don't know.

To be fair, I decided to read this again. (Most of the scripts I read at least twice.) Unfortunately, I still feel the same way. The logline is confusing and so are the first ten pages. I really do think this is going to be one of those love it or hate screenplays. Maybe I don't hate it, but I don't like it either.

Good luck.

Thank you.

I gave this one a rating of "Fair".

Dan Lennox (Level 5)

I remember reading this logline and wondering what type of story this might be, but after reading the first ten pages, I find myself pleasantly surprised. This was very good... Well written and concise.

This was one of those scripts that just move along so nicely, and before you know it, you're already at page ten.

I don't really have anything else to say on this one, except this gets a Very Good from me.

Nice work.

David Birch (Level 5)

i thought the element of your screenplay that stood out the most was the character descriptions...really visual and informative...especially your description of "brunt"...i had a little problem with the opening scene because i couldn't get a bearing on if the story is taking place in a time other than today...seems like it should be set in the past...on thing to consider is that you might want to introduce your main character (penguin pete) sooner than page 5...i'm assuming from the title and his bravado that this is going to be your protag...a nice piece in the making with a little tightening...

Faith Friese Nelson (Level 5)

The writer has a firm grip on proper screenwriting formatting but I have several concerns.

The first ten pages contains over ten characters, too many to keep track of. I make this same mistake. Because of the title, the main character is probably Penguin Pete, but I would have never guessed this if I hadn’t had the title. Try to focus on the main character for the first ten pages.

Another concern I had with these ten pages is I could not ascertain the time period. Is this story taking place in modern time or in the early 1900s or earlier. Just could not tell.

If you can same thing with less words then do so.

Example #1: Haki looks at the man behind him. Nods. Consider instead: Haki nods at the man behind him.

Example #2: “The Australian desert landscape drawn on canvas looks very lifelike as the backdrop of the stage. Consider instead: “The canvas backdrop, the Australian desert landscape, looks very lifelike.

A comment about the MAURICE description. As stated: “MAURICE, 50s, shiny bald pate…” Why not just say shiny bald head. You made me go to the dictionary which took me out of the story. Why use a “quarter” word when a “nickel” word does just as well?

A comment about ELI: As stated: “ELI, 40s, clerical attire, wooden dentures sails in behind Manco.” So, here’s my question… How do we know he has wooden dentures? Is he grinning like a Cheshire cat? Is he opening his mouth wide in a scream? Remember to only write what will be filmed.

Herman Chow (Level 5)

Man, I tell you this is a very tough and confusing read for me. I am just guessing here, English is not your first language. Sorry if I'm wrong. I'm saying this is because some of the action paragraphs and dialogue are just awkward and they don't really flow.

The first four pages lost me completely. So was Haki who pointed a gun at Brunt? Or was it Souise? And what's with the milk bottle? I didn't understand the purpose of the first scene. To me it was just two random guys with one guy calling out from somewhere.

The scene at the stage is the most confusing. The major problem is the high number of characters in that scene, and each of them seem to talk like the same. I see you have attempted humor, but it's hard for us to laugh when the situation is not completely clear.

Ohhh...now we see what Haki and Souise want. I suggest cutting out the first scene, it's redundant to the second scene. And try adding some dialogue that allude to their motive, because it's hard to imagine what they really want. If they're in a bank, then it's easy to figure it out. But in a theatre? Maybe not.

The scenes afterward were better, but some description are hard to understand, especially after Pete got shot. So did he really get shot at? Seems like there's someone who took the bullet for me. I don't really know. You might have to clear that up.

Oh man, another set of new characters. Sorry, don't get what these new characters want either.

My suggestion: try to keep your first 10 pages focus on one set of characters. I didn't have enough time to know them and then you cut to another set. You also need to establish what they want asap, or else the readers feel there's no direction to the story.

I see you have good intention, and what you have is very clear in your head, but sadly, not on the paper.

FAIR.

JeanPierre Chapoteau (Moderator)

I like the title and the logline. Let's see if the script lives up...

"Steel gray eyes record every..." I love that description. Makes him seem very intimidating.

When they switched to English, I think you need to put all french in parenthesis, so we know who's speaking what.

Blond hair and blue eyes look a part of the Antarctica environment? How?

"You won't be needing this where you're going" That doesn't sound right coming from his mouth. Well, at least the person I believe you created. And it's so cliche.

Okay, I thought the entire scene with Pengiun was so cool, but maybe a little too cool. The fact that he waited for the ship to get a foot away seems so unrealistic to me. Wouldn't the ice crack around him and he fall into the water? I hope you explain how he knew it wouldn't hit him or how he knew he wasn't going to fall under. Then he lights the match off the ship, ugh... I wasn't feeling that either. But the rest of the scene was really cool.

I'm not really sure what went on in this story, but I liked it. It seems like you established a bunch of characters other then the actual story. I didn't get what your script was actually about. I can tell in the logline line that Souise is going to have a wife and she is going to run off with Pete, but I don't see the set up for any of that in your script.

Great writing and excellent character though. I just wish the story was more clear.

Kevin Carty (Level 4)

I could be wrong but I wish you focused more on your main character. There seem to be too many tough guys running about at the moment. I also think you are introducing too many at once. I wish it were more like showing us what was going on but I swear you could absorb some of the characters into one. They seem so. I like circus in scripts but for some reason this seemed a little off. Especially, a script called penguin pete. I want this to grab me and not just be about introducing characters. You have at least 30 pages to do that. Some of your sentences need some splicing. I guess some will love this but I sort of need a lil bit more to hook me. I'll come back to this.

Khamanna Iskandarova (Level 5)

If Brunt is suspicious of everyone he fails to think that the milk might be poisoned.
p6 - "you went THROUGH a lot of trouble"?
P8 "His white uniform turns red at his chest" - whose - I'm not sure if you're talking about Penquin Pete or Captain.

It's too many characters for me albeit introduced at the nice pace. Are all these characters integral to the plot?

I do believe it's a nice story worth reading. The storyline is too simple as of this ten pages - Penquin Pete done bad things and they are looking for him. I think with a few more pages I'd be hooked. Maybe you could introduce some of the important info earlier?

KP Mackie (Level 5)

The title is a real attention-getter and the premise is visual and promises fun. Was anxious to see how the first ten with such a riveting logline would evolve. The beginning pages did not disappoint.
So many colorful characters and great description. The comedy of "Le Troupe de Toupee" borders on slap-stick. A gun to his head, "Brunt opens his fur coat" and he's loaded down with milk bottles. The image of the small steamship stuck in barren and snowy Antarctica is vivid enough, but posing as a theater whose "poor bald actors" primarily speak French and wear "long fake Kangaroo ears" is a scream. And, of course, Maurice the Director has a pet Poodle who doubles as a attack dog against the robber Souise.
Believe this script would make a terrific animated movie and still not sure if it's supposed to be solely live-action. Can't wait to see how "Le Troupe" eventually intersects with "Penguin Pete" and the likes of Manco, Eli, Broken Arm and Doc at the "Bella Roma." Entertaining stuff. Excellent.

Marcus Bakvis (Level 1)

I can see how it's supposed to quirky and a bit outrageous, which you've done a good job of, but just be careful that it doesn't become corny. Some of the dialogue and characters are just a little cliche, for example, some of Penguin Petes dialogue in the Icebreaker ship scene. Also the stage director is pretty corny.Of course it does make him quirky and funny if thats what you were aiming for. Like I said, be careful you're still being original.

Also, I just think the dialogue in the Stage Theatre is a little hard to understand and maybe some lines you can do without.

I do like how it is very quirky though. I can see it being a very charming little story!

Margaret Ricke (Level 5)

I knew this would be different. I expected it to be something colorful and over the top. You've delivered on both. I also expected to be able to understand it better...

Scene headings should contain three elements. The first is INT./EXT./I.E. The second is the LOCATION. The third is DAY/NIGHT. Keep them simple, concise and consistent. Don't use SAME. If your script goes into production, someone's going to generate a location report, and every scene heading that's written differently will generate a new location.

I really like the visual of the ice breaker bearing down on the dogsled and Pete standing there with his icy blue eyes.

Good work.

Marla Brecheen (Level 4)

The story has potential with the introductions of the main characters. Why not start the script in the middle of a conflict to capture the reader right away? I would have been more intrigued in the story if that were the case.

Martin Jensen (Level 5)

The opening scenes were comically absurd. Along with the title, it establishes the tone really well and quickly, and you've immediately got my interest with this encounter between Brunt and Haki.

I was slightly confused by the transition to the Antarctic. The action just stopped mid-scene. I was still very eager to find out who these people were and what they were doing. Somehow I feel like the bald actors' group was colossally misleading, unless it's going to have significance later.

It's hard to get a sense of all these characters introduced in only ten pages. I'm sure we'll get to know them more as the story progresses, and all the elements of the logline are set in motion nicely here, although by themselves these pages aren't indicative of what the script will be like, so it's hard to judge.

The one character introduction that completely worked for me was for Penguin Pete. A great name for a villain.

Good.

Mary McKevett (Level 2)

The surreal comedy, action and violence suggest a Tarantino style movie. The Furnace Hospital waiting room scene is brilliantly comic. For me, the feature film proper starts on p.5 with long shots of the bleak white-out landscape, the silence. The icebreaker gradually appearing - getting louder, smoking up the pristine environment, chewing up ice. Great intro to PP - a real cool dude with James Bond nerves but with a excess of arrogance and unwarranted violence (so far).

Suggestions - Perhaps start script on p.5. The action/caracters on p1-5 are good but a little too fast & too many characters for easing a viewer into a long feature.
Need to show a softer more vulnerable side of protagonist to maintain a certain amount of viewer empathy. Or show PP at the mercy of more ruthless, arrogant or violent antagonists.
(Reading it first time - I thought this a spoof on the Somali ship piracy situation only as geographically removed as possible). Look forward to seeing how this very original story unfolds.

Michael Alberstadt (Level 4)

Great work! There was very little to comment on...these few things will probably seem petty:

- TOUPEE has an accent in one instance, but not others.
- How are the languages handled? Is some in French? Should you denote subtitles somehow?
- The dynamite explosion seems like it should have killed a few people, including Penguin Pete, what with all the flying steel. How can you tweak this so Penguin Pete seems safer?

Looking forward to the rest of this story!

MJ Hermanny (Level 5)

Fantastic!!

Thoroughly enjoyed this, you create an amazing world that I want to spend more time in. Although you introduce a large amount of characters you do it very well with great visual descriptions, names and actions for all of them – I utterly adore Penguin Pete – what a guy you've created there!

I have few criticisms:

Wonder if a date might be useful at the beginning??

You need to state that subtitles will or will not be be used for the French scene. (French should be capitalised) This was one of the scenes that I found a little hard to grasp as so much was going on and the humour was lost a little. I also wonder if Penguin Pete's entrance should be your opening scene??

The scene in the hospital waiting room was also busy and quite hard to follow on first reading. I don't understand the dialogue between Manco/Eli and Broken Arm – perhaps mention the gun as they enter – why don't they just burst in if they're armed??

Adverbs and passive verbs pepperd throughout which should be avoided.

Heavily/furiously/slightly/slowly – become – over-tatooed/ nods, furious/a tad/a bit/ a fraction/

twitching/lying/toting/fuming/roaring – become – and twitch/ prone tells us he was lying/who tote/fire roars

etc

otherwise very good indeed, well done.

Paul De Vrijer (Level 5)

Well this is certainly unique. I really like the setting, I think this would make a great movie, but I'm personally not really attracted by it.

I feel like you should open the movie with the Penguin Pete scene. It's just perfect, it really is, sets the tone too. I feel like the ship should explode/sink as he departs, not earlier. Really set up the opening. It's strong, absolutely.

I love the icy world here and all the weird inhabitants. That's quite a world without fantasy clichés. I think you did something truly original here.

I don't care much for the Theatre scene, nor the end scene. Only the DOC-scene with the fingers is interesting again, I feel you could make those other scenes alot better.

There are some problems though, in the beginning, when some speak french and others english, why don't you specify who talks in what language? Becomes really confusing, because I don't know who can understand each other. There's also the problem with Orphan words. Words that create another sentence, but don't really add much. There's an entire section with extra sentences due to a single word on the next line. Try to trim that, it flows much better.

Points for originality and tone. But I wish the story and action were more arresting (besides the Penguin-Pete scene)

Paul Williams (Level 5)

Title: Sounds fit for an action/comedy type of story.

Logline: I like that you've changed "gun-hand" to "gunfighter," but why did you edit out "Penguin Pete?" Perhaps that was a comment you received in your reviews, so I'll defer to that. I believe you should have commas after "gunfighter" and after "climes." Also, I might find a different word than "climes," perhaps temperatures.

Page 1:

-You need a comma after "coat."

Page 3:

-I gotta be honest, I'm a little lost. Who are all these people? Who's our protagonist?

Page 7:

-You have an extra space after the Captain's dialogue towards the bottom of the page.

In summary, I'm afraid I have many, many issues with this one.

I thought this might be part comedy, based on the title, but I didn't really detect much humor here. This just seemed to be an assortment of random scenes, that perhaps all come together in the end, but it was hard for me to follow, as written now.

Who is our Protagonist? Penguin Pete? Brunt? Souise? Maurice?

As per your logline, the story's catalyst is the kidnapping of the crippled gunfighter's son, which should have occurred at page ten, yet his ex-wife and son aren't even introduced yet.

There are far too many characters introduced in these first ten pages. I counted at least eight with proper names and about twelve or thirteen with speaking parts. That's too many for ten pages, I think.

There are some commas missing throughout.

Fair.

Good luck to you.

Pete Barry (Level 5)

This alternates between inscrutable and hilarious. I read it three times just to make sure I get it, which is not a terrible thing. Some of the random funny is really well timed and laugh-out-loud ("We are but poor bald actors.") Even though it's telegraphed, Pete's striking of the match on the bow of the ship is a great stylistic intro to the character. I'm sorry I didn't get to see more of Eli, but I can wait for the rest of the script. There's a rich visual imagination crafting this world: part Wild-West, part Baron von Munchausen. Terry Gilliam would kill to direct this.

The imagination of the piece gets the better of you at times. The opening scene is vivid and interesting (robbing for milk, a strange Australian biopic) and raises questions that I'm willing to sit on (who the hell goes to the theater in Antartica?) The real problem is, I don't know who I'm routing for. I assumed, after the first scene, that Souise would be the villain, and Pete would be the hero. By the end of the ten, I realize I've got it backwards. But why should I care about Souise any more than Pete? Both are murderous outlaws and bullies; I don't get the Good or the Bad, just two Uglies. Also: the first scene cuts off just as the dog attacks Souise - I felt like I had completely missed something. At least show the dog biting off his hand, or thwarting the attack. As it is, you set up a fight and then said, "meanwhile, somewhere else..."

Pete's methods are hard to understand. He seems to be robbing the ship, or perhaps commandeering the ship (that's what he says). But then he puts a hole in it and lets it sink to the bottom of the ocean. Not such a successful robbery.

There are some problems, but the imagination of the writer alone makes me want to read more of this.

Philip Whitcroft (Level 5)

Let's see how this goes...

Pg 2 - This first couple of pages are definitely bizarre. I'm interested but so far I've not engaged with the story and the fact that they are now being funny in French seems unlikely to help.

Pg 5 - After being a bit directionless for five pages now the main character has appeared in a cold start position relative to what has already happened. Hopefully he'll give us something to route for in the story.

Pg 8 - That's a pretty memorable character intro. I'm suspecting it might be redundant within the story since he has taken nothing from the ship, so what difference would it make if none of this happened and we just met him out on the ice?

Pg 9 - This is another cold start, with another group of new characters. This can work but it is very hard to start fresh repeatedly and engage the audience each time.

Overall I like the madcap tone of this and in particular the location is fresh and cool. Unfortunately beyond that I struggled to connect with the story. I'd suggest starting on the ice with Penguin Pete and using his viewpoint as the way to introduce and set up the story.

Richard Scott (Level 2)

Interesting. You seem to have a decent story structure laid out here, but there was a few things I couldn't get past.

Time stamp? Did I miss it? I had no idea what time frame this story is taking place in, and that makes it really difficult to discern the plausibility of certain events, evaluate speaking patterns, buy in to settings etc

I got nothing out of your dialogue. For the most part is was silly, unimportant or just too direct. Nothing distinguishable was said by any character, and it just wound up being talking heads with silly gimmicks.

The ship scene was a bit much. Unless this is intended to a be a full out far-fetched romp (a la Sin City, Kill Bill) this is really the kind of thing that should be talked about as part of the legend of a man, not something we should be subjected to. And again, the dialogue just takes you right out of it.

I love the idea of an icy duster, but I really have no idea what I just read, what it's supposed to be or where it's going. In premise it has potential, but the execution seems rushed and disjointed.

Sally Meyer (Moderator)

I thought your story was fun and lighthearted. I enjoyed the different characters, all of them very colorful and interesting.

Your opener was strong, the scene of Brunt coming in to deliver milk for Maurice's poodle and I think it segued nicely into the next scene where Souise and Maki come in. It's good to start off with a mysterious figure, bring in a gun and you've got everyone hooked.

Good description of Penguine Pete. I could see him clearly in my minds eye from your description. I enjoyed that scene and want to know more about Penguin Pete now. Who is he, and why did he destroy the ship.

The pacing of the story is good, going from one interesting scene to another. The scene in the doctors waiting room is also strong, with some excellent snappy dialogue.

This was great, written well with interesting strong characters and a good hint of what's to come.

One thing I would have liked to have seen a hint of is the kidnapping. Or even the kidnapping that is in your synopsis. Maybe there just weren't enough pages?

Great job, I hope this does well.

Your title is very strong and tells a story, which is really good.

Scott Merrow (Level 5)

There's some really interesting stuff here. The Troupe de Toupee Theater -- great idea. Penguin Pete is a great character. Some interesting bad guys. Some great visuals, e.g., the ice breaker stopping a foot short of Penguin Pete's face. The whole weird Antarctic world you're creating is (pardon the pun) really cool. But, even for all that, what's the story? Who is the protagonist? Penguin Pete? You'd think so, since he's the title character, but so far all he's done is make a brief appearance -- and it hasn't really led anywhere yet, nor is it apparent how he even fits in with the rest of the stuff we've seen.

Who are the good guys? Who are the bad guys? Who are we rooting for?

Your logline talks about a crippled gunfighter, his ex-wife kidnapping their son, the most despicable rancher in Antarctica...where are these people? Where is there a hint of this story? By now, after ten pages, we should be totally hooked, waiting anxiously to see what's gonna happen on Page 11. But, I don't find myself hooked at all, just curious to see where this is all going.

This is really an original idea, but so far the story is just sputtering along.

My score: GOOD.

William Bienes (Mod Emeritus)

The writing is excellent as is the title, premise and logline. The problem is, I have no idea what's going on. The beginning is very confusing as to who is the protagonist and what is the actual conflict?

There is too much going on in the first ten -- and I don't think that's a bad thing at all, it's just hard to get into the story with the introduction of all the various characters or actually flesh out what the story is about.

Again, very solid writing -- wonderful images and interesting characters. This is a script that to adequately grade, I need more than the first ten. I'm going with Very Good on quality of imagery and originality.

Good luck (love the title).

Comments Made After the Contest

Chris Messineo (Founder) ~ 6/1/2010 12:10 AM

I love your imagination! I was really hoping this would move on. Your story and voice are both unique and I love that. I know you will finish it anyway and I'm sure it will be awesome!

Chris Keaton (Level 5) ~ 6/1/2010 12:19 AM

I gave you a VG, sorry.

KP Mackie (Level 5) ~ 6/1/2010 1:49 AM

Loved your story from the logline and so disappointed it didn't move on. What a terrific and visual writer you are. No wonder you're such a legend here.

MJ Hermanny (Level 5) ~ 6/1/2010 3:27 AM

I'm so sorry this didn't move on Rusty - I gave it an excellent and am pretty suprised it didn't advance.

Rustom Irani (Moderator) ~ 6/1/2010 4:19 AM

Think of this as Miyazaki meets Jeunet meets Gilliam. That's all I can say for now.

Thanks for all of your comments and I hope to complete this by year end.

Caroline Coxon (Mod Emeritus) ~ 6/1/2010 9:01 AM

What MJ said :)

Rustom Irani (Moderator) ~ 6/1/2010 9:17 AM

It's reassuring to know I'll have two lovely female fans who'll want to watch this film. ;)

KP - Look at my MP track record, man. I'm the almost legend. Plus, my imagination churns out all these weird characters and puts them in situations bizarre. Glad you liked it. :D

William Bienes (Mod Emeritus) ~ 6/2/2010 9:26 AM

Rusty, easily my favorite title I've read to date. An interesting group of characters to boot. Make sure I get updates on this script.

Rustom Irani (Moderator) ~ 6/3/2010 4:29 AM

I'll definitely be providing updates to everyone. Thanks William.

Quick question, did anyone get a hint that the biography performed by the bald actors was based on Penguin Pete's life in Australia where he's killed all the Kangaroo before moving to Antarctica? Francois is playing Penguin Pete with the blond wig and black clothes.

Caroline Coxon (Mod Emeritus) ~ 6/3/2010 6:44 AM

I believe KP is a lovely female fan too!

(Unless you weren't counting me in your comment of before!)

Rustom Irani (Moderator) ~ 6/3/2010 7:15 AM

Oh! All these initials are to be blamed for foot in mouth.

Now I am optimistic about a writerly cheer-leading squad. Thank you ladies! All three of you. :)

Pete Barry (Level 5) ~ 10/2/2010 8:36 AM

Where's Penguin Pete?

Rustom Irani (Moderator) ~ 10/3/2010 3:55 PM

In stasis, awaiting thawing.